Saturday, October 31, 2015

Throne of Glass: Book Review

Heyo! Yandere Panda here!

*in a sing song voice FOR THE FIRST TIME IN FOREVEERRRRR... Haha, jk. 

Okay, so this will be my first book review of the first book in a more recent series. I just finished it, and thought "Oh, hey! Why not make a blog post! It pertains to the blog theme in general! Wooh! Yippeee! Toodaloo! Fruity doody doo!"




Ahem... *coughs

Oh, right uh... To the review!



Throne of Glass: General Premise

 As a writer myself, I tend to be more critical when it comes to written work, and will call things as I see it after analyzing, and it was my pleasure to come across this book, after stumbling upon it at my local library. 

Throne of Glass is a YA fantasy novel, the first in the series of the same name.

This illustration just screams "Chuck Norris Bada**ery"

The book follows Celaena Sardothien, an assassin in a fictional world, set in the kingdom of Ardalan, a kingdom that is ruled by a tyrant that has banned magic. (Whatta jerk. Must be a muggle or something.) She is famous for what she does, and a year prior to the story, was captured and sent to the Great Salt Mines of Endovier for punishment.

In the Great Salt Mines, she was forced into inhumane, slave labor where guards would whip the prisoners very harshly and abuse them on a daily basis, leaving them with little food, and terrible living conditions. The conditions of the place were so bad, that even surviving for a few weeks was lucky. Due to a year of being in these living conditions, Celaena was stuck in a weakened state, and obviously nowhere near as powerful as she was in her Assassin days, with scars all over her and painful memories.

Lucky for her, the Crown Prince of Adarlan, Dorian comes by and offers her freedom from the mines, but on one condition: she must become his champion in a competition for being the Royal Assassin of Adarlan. She must fight twenty-three other contestants, consisting of warriors, thieves, and killers. If she wins, she will serve as the King of Ardalan's assistant for four years, and then will be free. If she loses, she will return to the Salt Mines. She agrees to enter this competition, and is escorted by the Captain of the Guards, Chaol, to the Glass Castle, where the competition is being held.

We also find out a bit more about Celaena's background. She didn't choose to be an assassin, she had no choice. It is revealed that Celaena is from the kingdom of Terrasen, and her parents were killed when she was little, being traumatized by it (as revealed later). After her parents were killed, the King of the Assassins, Arobynn, rescued her and gave her an option: either to end up as an orphan on the streets or to be taught the ways of the Assassin and repay him in the future. She chose the latter option, and the King of the Assassins became the closest thing she had to a parent, being brought to a keep, and trained amongst other people. She's slain her first victim at the age of nine years old, and also dealt with a lot of hardship along the way. At this point, and throughout the book, we still do not know how she got captured and the exact background of the whole thing, but supposedly it is explained in the e-Reader prequels and the sequels after.

In addition, it is also hinted that she has a connection to magic, but nothing is really revealed, as the King ruled out magic, destroyed magical beings, and just created a ton of hardship in her life, in general, as His Majesty had a role in having her separated from her home. And now she's stuck with the possibility of working for him, but only if she survives this competition. Now I know the competition part with the fight of the death sounds a lot like Hunger Games and Battle Royale, but there's so much more to it. This book has a few similarities to other popular books, but there's just so much going on at once in the story, which makes it more unique. (Now THAT, is inspiration from different books done right. I'm looking at YOU, Divergent. You could use a few tips. *dodges bullets from the fangirls. Yes, THIS is how you dodge a bullet, Tris.)

Thank you, thank you. *holds up wine glass with Kool-Aid in it and does that Leo smirk thing.

They finally arrive at the Glass Castle, and Celaena is given a luxurious bedroom, clothing, food, and a wonderful selection of beautiful clothing. It turns out that our sassy, arrogant, sarcastic main heroine has quite the feminine side to her, being fond of clothing, reading, and playing the piano. She goes under a codename in the competition, so nobody else knows about her being the Queen of Assassins, besides Chaol, Dorian, King, and the servants. Her alias is Lillian, a Jewel Thief, much to her dismay. Later on, she meets the other twenty-three competitors. 

Over the course of nine weeks, the competitors will train with their respective trainers and tests will be conducted every so often, to knock out contestants, until four remain, and will duel by the time nine weeks is over. People will go home or die if they lose. The winner of the duel will become the King's Assassin. Chaol, her trainer person tells Celaena to lay low and not reveal her identity as a strategic maneuver, which annoys our prideful heroine to no end. She's far too full of pride to want to appear weaker than the rest of her competition. Which is understandable, I mean anyone who's known as the best of something would probably act in the same way, if they were thrown into her situation prior to the story, and then forced to act like one of the weakest competitors while the other contestants taunt her mercilessly for being "pathetic". 

As the weeks pass by, we see some development with the relationships of Celaena with Dorian and Chaol. With her witty, facetious nature, she tends to bicker with them a lot, but we definitely see growth between them all. At first, we see some physical attraction from the dudes towards Celaena, as Celaena is said to be very beautiful. Anyway, Chaol and Celaena interact a lot in this book, as he is her advisor and trainer and he finds out a decent amount about her, even though he started off distrusting her as an assassin. Their feelings end up growing for each other, even though Chaol doesn't want to admit them at all. Dorian and Celaena don't interact nearly as much, but when they do, there's definitely banter and more physical attraction and their feelings grow for each other. Ooh! Love triangle!

Alright, I know what some of you guys are thinking. YA Fiction? Love Triangle? Seriously? Lol, well a ton of forms of entertainment have love triangles nowadays. It's a norm. And this one, is actually pretty well developed. Chaol and Dorian are childhood friends and it's interesting to see their interaction with one another. Also, we get to see the relationships with Celaena on both sides and how they differ. Dorian is a prince who is kind and highly disagrees with the deeds that the King has done and spends the first book wondering what he should do about it, as he's powerless to stop the King. He chose Celaena as his competitor, as a form of rebellion towards his father and then ultimately fell in love with her. She's different from the noble ladies that he's courted, she provides more insight into the state of the kingdom and brought a different perspective onto his life. I know that sounds a tad cliche, but there's definitely a lot more to it, once you read the book and see it for yourself. Also, things get a lot more complicated in the second book, so I hear. With Chaol, he started off highly distrusting her, always mocking and teasing her, but still carried out his job and trained Celaena. Over time, he starts to find out more about her background and starts to trust her and eventually have feelings for her, but doesn't really realize it till later. Now, this is a love triangle done right. We see development on both sides, we don't really know who she will end up with, and we can see it happening for either of them. Way better than a certain "love triangle" I blogged and ranted about before. *cough

Along the way, we find out a bit more of the competition and a few other characters. This big, muscular, powerhouse is Celaena's main competitor. Cain, a shower bag who always taunts people, but is well loved by the other contestants, because of his strength and natural fighting abilities. Celaena also gets an ally, named Nox. He's a kind thief, and they help each other in the competitions. Throughout the book, I sincerely wished for the poor kid to not die. This noble, satanic woman, named Kaltain is also thrown into the story. She's thirsty for Dorian, but there's far more to her. As the secondary antagonist, she basically is there to find out more about the true identity of "Lillian" and will stop at nothing to mess with the competition. Celaena also gets another ally, Princess Nehemia, from the kingdom of Eyllwe. Nemehia was sent to Adarlan, to learn the ways of the kingdom, or so we're told. She secretly aids the slaves and rebels of her kingdom, as they are going through corruption as well. She's witty and arrogant as well, but sensible and kind, becoming Celaena's closest companion.

As the competition goes on, some of the people in the contest start to die off, one by one, mysteriously in the castle. The deaths are brutal too, having their organs ripped out, limbs dismembered, etc. Then, Celaena discovers these strange, magical markings around the castle and ends up having strange dreams. She then discovers more and more secrets of the kingdom and the castle itself, and soon, it is up to her to stop the growing threat and win the competition... Before it's too late. Many twists and turns happen, and some of the supporting characters have a far bigger role than you think, later on.

The Review

Although this book is not perfect, there were definitely aspects about it that impressed me, a person who is generally not fond of YA novels, ever since books like Divergent started copying off of each other with their cliches and badly written narratives.

Let's start off with Celaena Sardothien. Overall, I definitely saw her as a well-written character. She's complex, has strengths and flaws, and has a very large role in the story, especially in later books as we find out more about her. But this review, will mainly be analyzing her character in the first book. Celaena was my favorite character, and potentially could be on my "Top Female Characters List". Whether she will or not, will depend on how good of a character she is in the later books. Anyway, I just loved the backstory of Celaena. 

She's an assassin, but there's so much more to it. Being from another kingdom and not much being revealed about her time there, waking up with the blood of her dead parents on her at the age of eight, being taken in by Arobynn, and trained as an assassin in the Assassin's Keep. At a young age, she experienced much hardship and trauma. She mentioned to Chaol that one time, Arobynn stated that she needed to be good with a sword with her left hand, as she was mainly right handed. To do so, Arobynn gave her the option: either he would break her right hand or she will do it herself. And that's exactly what she did. Then, she mentioned to have lost a lover prior to the story, and then was brought to the Great Salt Mines. There, she was whipped over twenty times when she first arrived. She almost didn't make it, but a slave girl gave her some salve. The next day, the slave girl was raped and murdered by the guards right in front of her. Celaena continued to go through crap like this, and one day she had it. She tried to escape the place and murdered twenty-three of the guards who treated the prisoners and slaves so horribly. Unfortunately, she failed to escape, after coming close. Even after being relocated to the Glass Castle, she dealt with traumatic nightmares and still has the scars on her body. We also know that she has some connection to magic, but that's not expanded upon until later books. So we see now, that she's so much more than your typical female assassin who is powerful.

I mean, it makes a whole lot of sense for her to be an extremely powerful assassin if she was trained by the best one in the land from a young age. She has knowledge of turning anything into a weapon, knows her poisons, and is a capable battler though she's definitely weaker than before due to malnutrition and being beat up all the time. She also loves to read and is miraculously good at the piano. Though the latter didn't make too much sense to me, but whatever, I guess it's supposed to add onto her character? However, one thing that bugged me about this book was the fact that it kept saying that she was "beautiful", over and over again. Like, we get it, we got it after the first few times. And the constant suitors vying for her attention whenever she dresses up in a pretty gown. It just got really repetitive. The flirting and physical attraction aspects to her relationships with the two dudes kinda bugged me also, as that was also repetitive. Though I do like the flaws that she has. Troubles with the trauma, being very slobby and unladylike at times, her wit and arrogance. I liked the sassy banter between her and the other characters as it added a lot of humor and it made her character more interesting. The arrogance was understandable, as she truly was one of the best, and hey, no person is perfect. Flaws are good to see in a character, because nobody likes someone who's perfect in every aspect. *groans. Anyway, I kinda understand where she's coming from with the physical attraction towards Dorian and Chaol. She's a teenage girl, and it's nice to know that she's not some typical, stone-faced assassin who is immune to love while everyone else is pining for her. Assassin or not, she's still a teenage girl and I respect her liking towards clothing and attractiveness in people, as those things ultimately make her seem more relatable and human. I'd take that over some stone-faced assassin who is perfect at everything and is unrelatable to the audience. 

Though I find love triangles to be a little too common these days, this one to be more interesting and better developed. I liked Chaol and Dorian and I personally did not care too much about who she ended up with because I liked the interaction between the three. I liked Chaol because he was more complex, being a Captain of the Guards, tasked with dealing with an assassin of all people. Dorian came off to me as a stereotypical prince, at least at first. The charming, attractive, Adonis, who doesn't act much like a prince. But then, we start to see more to him, which is a common theme in this book, as you can see. Things are never what they appear to be, and everything has a lot more to it. Dorian doesn't know exactly everything that is going on in his kingdom and castle, but he clearly has an idea of what the King has been up to, and I'm anxious to see what happens in later books, because supposedly, he goes through a lot later on.

Nehemia was one of my favorites also. She ultimately had a role in helping Celaena with the magical aspect of the story. Her interaction and friendship with Celaena was a pretty great one, with development on both sides.

I also liked the roles of the antagonists in the story. The King, the Duke, Kaltain, and Cain. They all are connected through the secrets of the castle and the kingdom, connected to the magic somehow, which is yet to be explored in the later books. I also liked the connection between the King and Celaena and the role it played in the story. 

And now, we move onto the plot. Honestly, I loved the plot as a whole. There were multiple plots going on at once and I can tell that it's thought through very well. We have a deathly competition for a position in the kingdom, a love triangle, magical connections, the roles of the antagonists in the events, the mysterious deaths, the friendship between Nehemia and Celaena, Nehemia's role in the story, Celaena discovering what she was meant to do and be, etc all going on at once. It's a very complex, but a well-structured plot. And in the next book, we will find out more of Celaena's role in the series, her true connection to magic, and more about these mysteries of the kingdom. A good setup.

Overall, the plot, characters, dialogue, and development were very well written. But some of it falls short with the excessive descriptions and some issues with repeating aspects of Celaena's character that are overdone. I would give it a 4 out of 5, or at least a high 3, if possible. It's definitely not a 3 out of 5, as it is far better than that, but it is definitely not higher than a 4 out of 5 with the reasons being stated above. I enjoyed this book, and I actually finished the thing, which is unusual. Most of the time, I will drop the book some time through if it becomes too dragged out and boring or if something just sucks about it in general. What kept me going was definitely the complexity of the plot, the different twists in the story, and the interest in the main heroine. With that being said, I will definitely read the second book and see what I think about it.

Till then, good day, my fine people! And happy Halloween! I am spending mine watching old, kid movies like Nightmare Before Christmas and just chillin and reading up on what will happen in this series. Unlike most people, I actually like to look up what happens in stories, because I hate not knowing things and I also need to know what to expect, in case if I have to drop the series!









Monday, October 26, 2015

Rant on Twilight: Tenth Year Anniversary Edition

Warning: Much Rant and Shade

Yo! YanderePanda here! Just so you know, NotYourBlendedFruit will have her snark and salt about her KDramas and KPop coming soon!

Ah yes, the Saga that has brought much disgrace to the medium that is known as Literature. The Twilight Saga has had very mixed reactions, being known as a "best-seller" and also known as one of the most hated series on the face of the Earth. As you can tell by the heading and the title, I side with the latter. And before you Twilight Fangirls (And possible boys... O_o)throw any pointy weapons at me, let me point out the many arguments that prove that this series should be set on Greek Fire and thrown into the darkest pits of Tartarus, for it is even too much for Satan himself to handle. I mean come on, you know a series sucks, when even Stephen King, one of the greatest authors of the era, stated that the author "Could not write a darn". 

Premise of the "Book"

Okay, so we start off with a girl named Bella Swan, AKA one of the worst excuses I've seen for a female protagonist. She's up there on my "Characters That Suck Pond Water" list. Why people like this character is beyond me.

We start off with some average, plain girl who moves to Forks, Washington. She was said to be some "perfectly average girl". Nothing is really said about what makes her special. The only thing about her is that she ends up in clumsy situations. Oh, and the fact that she is not that girly and is stubborn and is supposedly "down to earth" and "unique" just because she doesn't like makeup or jewelry and is "Different from other girls". That's all we get from her. So someone please tell me, how the heck does some average, plain girl end up being crazy popular? Everyone LOVES her. She has one dude chasing after her immediately, followed by girls that are jealous of her. Like seriously, if she's so "special" and "lovable", why doesn't the freaking writer explain WHY? It was even stated in the book that she was practically a nobody before she moved to Forks. Am I missing something here? WHY IS SHE SO WELL LIKED? Bella's character in general is just boring. Are you seriously telling me that there aren't any other girls in this school that don't like makeup and jewelry and don't have INTERESTING personalities? We get almost no background for Bella. All we know is that her parents are divorced and that she just moved to Forks for a change of pace and has a red truck. Also, having Kristen Stewart play Bella doesn't exactly help, either.

And then, we end up with Edward. He only talks to his family and is known as the "mysterious, practically god-like Adonis". We get some little moments between Edward and Bucket-Face. Actually, let's just give them nicknames at this point, makes the shade so much more fun. Bella will be Bucket-Face, and Edward can be PedoBear. He's over 100 years old and is interested in seducing a 17 year old girl. If that's not bordering pedophile, I don't know what is.

Ahem. Okay, moving on. They start off as lab partners, and Pedobear is intrigued by the smell of her blood. Then he starts to get interested in her... And stalk her. Yeah. He watches her at all times, finds out where she lives, climbs into her bedroom, watches her sleep. I seriously wonder how the heck Stephanie Meyer thought of THAT idea. "Hmm, I wonder what the most romantic thing my perfect, personality-lacking, vampire-who-is-a-vegetarian,(no offense to any vegetarians out there) Romeo can do! Oh I know! I'll have him climb into her bedroom at night and watch her sleep all the time from the corner of her room!" Yes, because EVERY SINGLE TEENAGE GIRL OUT THERE WANTS A FREAKING PEDO TO CLIMB INTO THEIR WINDOWS AND HIDE IN THEIR CLOSETS AND WATCH THEM SLEEP. You see, this is why I hide a taser in my room. HIDE YO WIFE, HIDE YO KIDS, CUZ PEDOWARD CULLEN IS CLIMBIN IN YO WINDOWS. HE'S HIDIN IN DEM CLOSET, BOUT TO SNATCH YO TEENAGE DAUGHTER UP. I swear, if MY Senpai ever did that to me, I would tie a rope around his neck and let him dangle off of Mt. Everest. You know what? I like that nickname. Pedoward. 

You know, of all the girls for Edward to fall in love with, in decades, why did it have to be Bella? Again, she's a boring, average girl who just has an appealing blood scent to her. Man, that's creepy. Also, you can't read her mind. Thank the heavens, because I don't even want to know what you WOULD do if you COULD read her mind. Also, Bucket-Face, how the poopstain did you fall in love with THAT PEDO? AFTER FINDING OUT THAT HE WAS STALKING YOU AND IS OVER 100 YEARS OLD. I rest my case. If you're going to fall in love with a vampire, at least fall in love with one that doesn't sparkle. Heck, I don't think the author knew a single thing about vampires before she wrote this book. Sparkling, vegetarian vampires that can use mirrors, and don't get destroyed by garlic, holy water, or wooden stakes? DO YOUR FREAKING RESEARCH. I would also like to complain about the two pages dedicated to Bucket-Face eating a granola bar. And the four pages dedicated to her making enchiladas. 

Also, how the heck did Bucket-Face earn the affections of Jacob? It was just kinda randomly thrown in there. See, it was never really explained why people liked other people in this book. Seriously, how in the world did Bella and Edward have a proper relationship? They had nothing in common except for being fans of Clair de Lune. Seriously, what do they even talk about? This freaking relationship was based off of attraction and stalking. Where are the conversations and personality loving aspects in this "relationship"? It was literally just her meeting him, him stalking her, her finding out what he is, then dating. If this is a romance novel, at LEAST develop the freaking romance in a better way. Geez.

The relationship itself is controlling and abusive. It's unhealthy and unnatural. He looks at her and acts towards her in ways that freak her out, he controls who she talks to and what she does, he makes all of the decisions, he isolates her from her family and friends, etc, etc. And unsurprisingly, Bucket-Face stays with him. She gave up so much of her life to be with this idiot. This isn't a relationship of love, this is control, abuse, and based off of shallow, physical attraction. Explain to me, Twihards, on how this is attractive or even remotely appealing to you. Also, why does Bella ALWAYS HAVE TO GET SAVED BY HIM? Ever since she entered the relationship with this Pond Scum, she could never do anything on her own without him. By the end of Twilight, she stays with him, even after all of this BS and after nearly getting killed. Tell me again why you're in love with him? Attraction? Sure. Personality? No. Control and abuse? Yes. Almost dying? Yes. Well fan-freaking-tastic. 



New Moon

Okay, so Bucket-Face is yet again, pulled into danger. Quelle surprise. Then, PedoWard dumps her in the middle of the forest, stating that he's doing it to protect her. Pedoward at this part, actually made a pretty good decision. Then, the Cullens leave. Bucket-Face is in a "zombie-mode" state of depression, where she cries in her room every single day for months and refuses to talk to anyone. She was with the dude for what? A few months? Puh-lease. Someone needs a freaking reality check. 
Hermione and Daenerys are among my favorite female characters of all time, and are very well written. There are freaking good reasons why.


As said in the picture, Bella jumped off a freaking cliff. This was after she got out of "Zombie-Mode". How did she get out of it? She rode on some sketchy dude's motorcycle with the sketchy dude, claiming that she felt PedoWard's presence. Um, no. That presence you felt was another creepy a** dude. Flash forward a little bit, and our buddy Jakey is back.

She starts to hang out with the Wannabe Animagus. Yes, that's what we will call him from now on. She builds motorcycles with him and basically leads him on. She always hangs around him, goes to places with him, blah blah blah. Yeah, she pretty much used him as a crutch, just because PedoWard was out of her life. Flash forward a bit more, and we find out that Wannabe Animagus is a "Werewolf"! Yes! Another failed portrayal of a mythological creature!
'
Wannabe Animagus starts avoiding her and other crap happens. Then she jumps off a cliff. Then more other random tension goes on between her and the Mutt. And then Alice, aka the only likable character in the whole freaking series shows up. Eureka! Turns out PedoWard believes she's dead after jumping off the cliff and now wants to be dead also by turning him in to some Italian Vampires! Wowza! Cheese and crackers! Long story short, more crap happens and then PedoWard comes back and they get back together. Oh, and Wannabe Animagus gets mad. Confirmed that she was just using him for her own desires to be loved and whatnot, and then crawls back to the Pedo. Here we go again. Joyous. -_-

Eclipse

More love triangle? Fan-freaking-tastic! This book was just set up to add onto this sad excuse for a love triangle. Yes, a choice between necrophillia and Bestiality. Honestly, I'd just root for the dude who almost ran her over with his car. Too bad it didn't actually happen, because then this stupid series would end and I wouldn't have to deal with this sad excuse for a female protagonist. A shell of a girl who is a disgrace to females all over and lets a shallow romance get in the way of her judgement over an abusive relationship with a dude who's practically dead and that she will throw her life, friends, and family away for, only to get involved with another dude who was a sad excuse for a werewolf, who she used as a crutch.

Anyway, there's a "war" going on in Eclipse. War of Vampires. Wooh. Wooh. Yeah, like twenty vampires. And it's the height of the "love triangle". Back and forth and back and forth. Oh, and PedoWard proposes and she accepts. "Teenagers" getting married! Wooh! Joyous! Totally not a bad idea! They weren't even together for that long and PedoWard is still a facist dictator. Anyway, the love triangle is just pathetic. Jacob was barely a threat and it was obvious from New Moon that she was using him. The Team Edward and Team Jacob stuff was just stupid, because anyone smarter than a sack of bricks would know what the heck will happen. This story is about, or at least supposed to be about vampires in a "romance" (Romance that was badly developed.) At least Jacob and Bella had a better relationship in terms of development and no shallow and abusive stuff. Eclipse was just weak in general. Little surprise here. I mean, the only things I surprisingly liked about this book were the back stories of the side characters. If the freaking author who couldn't write a darn could at least come up with semi-decent backstories, why the crap couldn't she make Bella and Edward a little more interesting? Anyway, we get that cringe-worthy tent scene with Bella and Jacob and the sleeping bag... Anddd we get a kiss between them to "Make things more dramatic" and then Bella suddenly believes she loves Jacob also. Woot! Woot! Suspense! No.

We get a "Battle". All the bad guys are dead! Wooh! And then we get like one injured person on the good side. Seriously? This is what you call a fight? Sigh... Anyway, Bella decides to be a showerbag and chooses Edward and tells him this while he's badly injured. Go figure. Smooth. Oh, and there was also that part a bit earlier, where Jacob kissed her and she "punched" him in the face and then broke her hand. That was hilarious. And stupid. So, you "punch" a werewolf in the face, but you don't do anything about your "boy toy" when he controls and stalks you all the time? Seems legit. Well then. 

Breaking Dawn

Yeah, many issues going on here as well. So let me get this straight, you get married to PedoWard, at age 19, straight out of high school, willing to give your life away, throwing your family and friends away, for a vampire who controls you? Ugh, Bella. You're a loafing idiot. Anyone who doesn't think she's a bad character at this just... -_- Anyway, all she wants is him, for stupid reasons, and stays with him, for stupid reasons. God. Bless. America. She practically now lives for this baka, and is giving up her humanity for him. And just a few months ago, she wasn't sure that he was "The One", because of the "Love Triangle". Does this make any sense to anyone? Or is it just me?
She marries him, says practically goodbye to everyone else and goes on her honeymoon. And then she comes back... Pregnant. WHAT THE ACTUAL FLYING POOP MONKEY?



A half... Vampire... Baby? Okay, lemme get this straight. A Vampire, got a human girl pregnant. Think about it, because I am NOT going into detail about that! But it MAKES NO SENSE AT ALL. Anyway, she has to drink human blood to keep the "vampire fetus" alive. Um... What? And she states that she actually likes the taste of blood. WHY DIDN'T HE JUST TURN HER INTO A VAMPIRE THEN. GEEZ. THIS WOULD'VE BEEN A WHOLE LOT EASIER EARLIER ON. Um... Okay? Moving on, she has her baby. And then, she almost dies in the process, and  THEN GETS TURNED INTO A VAMPIRE. And then suddenly she transforms into a practical goddess and is suddenly perfect at everything... Wow. Way to make her even less likable, if that was even possible. 
 Oh, and then Wannabe Animagus shows up and imprints the child as his "Soul Mate"...? Great, now Stephanie Meyer is putting pedophilia and bestiality onto a newborn infant. Great. Just great. Oh, and they decide to name the child "Renesmee"... As if that's not punishment enough... And now she has to deal with a PedoWolf running after her. So it's basically like a forced soulmate kinda thing. And WHAT KINDA CHILDREN WILL THEY HAVE??? O.o And then she grows at a rapid pace, aging into a tween by the end of the book. Um... What...? If you're going to create more supernatural concepts, at least explain them better. Like I said earlier, NONE OF THIS MAKES ANY SENSE.

Guess what? WE RUN INTO ANOTHER WAR! WOOH! WOOH! FINAL BATTLE! BATTLE OF HOGWARTS BUT WITH VAMPIRES! Hehe, no. The only cool part about this last battle was getting a few vampires from other places and explaining a bit more about the covens.

Yes. This... Is... Pathetic. First the screwed up characters, the romance, the vampire concepts, the triangle, the first "war", and now this nonsense. Fan-freaking tastic. Also, if Bella is so "strong" now, being able to arm wrestle Emmett, how come she didn't even fight in this battle? Again, freaking useless. This fight was just stupid. (I'm going off of the books, in case you didn't notice for this whole freaking rant. I know they changed it in the film, but I ain't seeing that.) Anyway, things go back to normal, and there wasn't any suspense at all, and the events here were just poorly written as usual. We end up with them all living happily ever after, the end, which ALSO makes no sense. Bella's like "oh well nobody in the world can feel as much love as I do for you"... B****, you haven't even known this guy for like what? 3 years? A relationship based off control, abuse, and physical attraction? What in the world are you two gonna do for the next 250832981053809325801 years? What do you two even TALK about? Is he really so interesting that you throw your entire human life away, throw your family away, not see your friends again, etc? *Sighs.

Plot Holes


I briefly mentioned a few of them, but much needs to be asked, as this cannot be a complete snark without the questioning of the plot.
  1. How exactly is Edward unable to read Bella's mind? She's a regular human being at the start of the series. There's no explanation for this at all.
  2. If these Vampires were so powerful and invincible, why haven't they taken over the world already?
  3. Is Bella seriously the only one who found out about their existence besides the Werewolves? How is SHE the only one?
  4. What is so special about Bella's blood that makes it smell so good to Edward?
  5. What the heck is this sparkling nonsense? How does it work?
  6. Why was it such a big deal to go show off Edward's sparkling in the sunlight in a giant open area in Italy? I mean, I'm assuming humans would think that Vampires would have the same concepts as the ones in stories. They probably wouldn't think much of someone who is sparkling and they probably wouldn't immediately think he's a vampire of all things. I bet most humans would think he just had a ton of glitter on
  7. How exactly does Edward get into Bella's room without anyone noticing? Her Dad is a COP
  8. If Edward wanted to die so badly, why did he go to Italy to do it? Vampires in this universe are weak to fire and could probably be killed by other methods too
  9. Why did Jasper get so crazy about Bella's paper cut? I mean, he must've been around blood so many other times in high school and was perfectly fine
  10. How could Jasper control Bella's emotions if she had this "shield" that Edward couldn't even read into and even Jane couldn't even torture
  11. Again, how did Bella get pregnant? It was stated in the book that people's blood turns into venom when they become vampires. That clearly makes it impossible to create a baby.
  12. Also... Vampires are supposed to be made of stone in this universe
  13. Wouldn't people get suspicious of the Cullen's appearances? They all look very different with the very pale skin and the gold eyes. Wouldn't someone at least believe that something is going up?
  14. It took Bella and Alice two days to reach the Volturi. How come it took the Volturi three months to get to them?
  15. Why does Renesmee suddenly stop aging so quickly when she reaches the teen ages?
  16. IT SAYS SO IN THE MOVIES/BOOKS THAT VAMPIRES DON'T BREATHE. HOW CAN YOU HAVE BLOOD IF YOU CAN'T BREATHE.
  17. There is absolutely NO explanation for all the supernatural abilities for the vampires in Breaking Dawn. 
  18. Why are werewolves and vampires enemies again? How did they start in the first place? 
  19. Charlie is an idiot.
  20. What happens if Jacob and "Nessie" get together and Jacob ends up aging like a normal human being? Do "werewolves" even age?
There are many more, that need to be addressed.

As you all can see, Twilight is not something that is well written and I believe that I have pointed out enough inconsistencies with the story and characters and premise to conclude that. Come at me, Twihards. And yes, I have read all four of the books years back, and it was quite traumatizing. Honestly, the best part about the story was the part about the enchiladas. 




Saturday, October 24, 2015

Is Korra worse than Aang as an Avatar?

Aang vs. Korra. Who was better?


As a fan of both Legend of Korra and Avatar: The Last Airbender, I have seen people compare the two main characters: Aang and Korra. I've also seen many people state Korra is weak, while others have praised her strength. Either way, the character as been mixed, which makes sense. We, as an audience, have to compare Legend to Korra to its predecessor, the wonderful masterpiece that is known as Avatar: The Last Airbender. I think the main reason why Korra gets a decent amount of hate, is because of the fact that we have to compare her series to the first one. If Avatar: The Last Airbender was not there before Legend of Korra, people would definitely have a different opinion of her. Either way, much needs to be said on both sides. YANDEREPANDA IS HERE, TO JUSTIFY THE SALT THAT BELONGS IN THE OCEAN.

Situations on Both Sides

Avatar Aang-


The last survivor of his kind. Aang was a 12 year old air nomad who was the Avatar during the events of ATLA. He had to master four elements and bring balance to the world. Conflict was arising, and he had to act fast and defeat the Fire Lord, Ozai in only a year. He had his comrades to help him out, AKA Team Avatar, and had different masters to train him in Fire, Water, and Earth. During the events of ATLA, he saved multiple lives, villages, learned energybending, defeated Ozai, brought peace back to the world, ended the war, and created The United Republic of Nations and Republic City. Pretty impressive stuff, if you ask me. Especially when he did most of it at 12 years old. He was great at the spiritual side of being the Avatar, having a crazy powerful Avatar State, but he fell short in the physical side and was more of a pacifist than anything. He had flaws and overcame them, and ultimately achieved a lot in his lifetime. He was pretty cool for a bald, midget kid.

Avatar Korra-

The Avatar right after Aang's time. Korra was a 17 year old female from the Water Tribe. After already mastering Fire, Water, and Earth, she had to master Air from Tenzin, Aang's son. Conflict arose multiple times during the events of Legend of Korra. She had to deal with Equalists and a Blood Bender who could take away bending, a Dark Spirit that fused with her Uncle, having her past lives destroyed, dealing with a crazy powerful Airbender while being poisoned badly, live with post-traumatic stress after being badly weakened from the poison, and defeat a ruthless dictator. Granted, she also had help, from her own Team Avatar and her teachers. She was skilled in the physical aspect of bending, but had trouble with the spiritual side, which was why she couldn't airbend at first, but later could. She could also heal, energybend, and metalbend. She had her own set of flaws, and was able to develop quite a bit and ultimately achieved a lot in her lifetime as well. Say what you want, but she was freaking awesome. Not as much as Toph, but nobody is as awesome as Toph Beifong.

I mean... Come on.

Seriously.

No? Fine. Moving on.


The Arguments

I've seen quite a lot of people state that "Korra is so much weaker than Aang" and "Korra is the worst Avatar ever", blah blah blah. Now, I would like to point out that while Korra may not necessarily be stronger than Aang, she definitely is not worse either.

People have stated that Korra is weaker because of the fact that she gets beat up a lot, or because she can't bend as well, or the fact that she doesn't go into the Avatar State as much and that her's isn't as powerful as Aang's.

Granted, I do believe that Aang has a more powerful Avatar State, but that doesn't necessarily make him the better Avatar. Keep in mind that Aang had to deal with one extremely powerful Fire Lord. Korra on the other hand, had to deal with an Equalist who could take away bending, a Dark Spirit, and fight two major villains while she was in a weakened state due to mercury poisoning. Now, I don't exactly know how much stronger the villains were in ATLA vs. LOK or vice versa, but keep in mind that both Avatars were thrown into different situations in different time periods, so it's honestly hard to compare them. 

Aang definitely has more powerful abilities in terms of spiritual power, while Korra is better with physical, as stated by Tenzin. Do realize that with the different time periods, there must be different styles of fighting. The creators based Aang and the other people in ATLA's fighting styles to be more based off traditional Martial Arts while Korra and the other people in LOK had more MMA style martial arts. I wouldn't necessarily state either as better, they're just different styles. Although I do miss all of the creative forms of the bending and the graceful style from ATLA, but it's personal preference I guess.

While I do believe that it is impressive for Aang to deal with so much at the age of 12, while Korra was 17, again, it's hard to compare as the two were still in very different situations. Also, Korra had to deal with the last two major villains WITHOUT her past lives as they got destroyed in Season 2. All Avatars dealt with different situations in their lifetimes. Compare Aang and Korra as much as you like and think what you wish about who is better, but Korra is definitely not the "Worst Avatar Ever", as we have only seen a handful of Avatars and their situations. Aang has the better Avatar State and spiritual ability, while Korra is better physically, with the ability to heal and metalbend as a bonus. She arguably dealt with more hardship and more enemies to deal with that could arguably be more powerful, depending on how one looks at it. Keep in mind that the two Avatars that we mainly saw had to be different. If we just had another carbon copy of Aang as the main protagonist in Legend of Korra, that would be just boring and repetitive. Making them different makes each Avatar unique, just like how each person is. Both had different abilities, situations, personalities, storylines, and growth. Comparing the two overall would be difficult in terms of who is better, but I definitely do not believe that Korra is worse than Aang and I don't think that she's the "worst Avatar ever".

Anyway, Korra is one of my favorite characters of all time, along with Aang. Yeah, yeah, I know, I know. She could be irritating in the beginning with her impulsive, rash, tomboyish nature and was whiny. But she developed into a fine Avatar who grew up into someone who no longer needed Tenzin's help, learned compassion, learned patience, dealt with Post Traumatic Stress, etc. She overcame so much in a few years, more than some of them in a lifetime, as said by Tenzin, aka the Yoda of LOK. Though, I would like to complain about that final battle in Season 4 with Kuvira. Was expecting more of a fight, but whatever, the Avatar State part was pretty awesome. Though I was expecting something more epic as the finale, but whatever, thanks Nickelodeon. Say what you want, she's still more useful than freaking Sakura Haruno, aka one of the most irritating and worst female characters.
Okay, I'll admit she became useful later on, but she still sucked as a character. Fight me. 
Haha, fine, I'll stop. The Sakura bashing can go somewhere else, maybe another blog post.



Now, now, I bet you're wondering, "Where's the snark, YanderePanda?" Well, I guess there's just not much to complain about, as LOK and ATLA are AWESOMESAUCE and they're part of my many fandoms. Nothing too rant worthy about it, except the fact that Nickelodeon is an a**hat and shouldn't have cut the freaking funding for LOK, otherwise we would've had more and better quality episodes. But NOOO, they just had to troll us viewers. Gee, thx brah. Hah, oh well, at least Korrasami happened. Why? Because KORRASAMI!Problems would've happened if Nick took THAT away. Don't mess with a Yandere. Especially a Yandere Panda. And don't mess with her Senpai. You'll get murdered into the last Oblivion, I tell you. SENPAI NOTICES ME, NOT YOU. BECAUSE UR DEAD. Do you wanna know what also ticks me off? When people call ATLA and LOK an "anime". IT'S A FREAKING CARTOON. IT'S AMERICAN MADE. IT'S AN ANIME INSPIRED CARTOON, YOU BAKA WEEBS! GEEZ.

Ahem... Er... Anyway... First Actual Post Thingy! Catch you guys later, with more commentary/rants/spiels/etc! YanderePanda Out!




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